Today is the first time I’ve posted away from my computer. I was just talking with one of my work mates about responsibility. How sometimes it feels like you do so much and there just isn’t any tangible reward.
Here’s the thing: I work hard. I do what I’m supposed to. I show up on time, I rarely call in (and only if I’m sick- I took my first “mental health” day a couple weeks ago because I was wiped out) But there are no parades, no t-shirts, no big or small thank yous. I work for a corporation. There isn’t a lot of time for hugs and Kumbaya. Sometimes I feel really frustrated that someone isn’t saying “thanks” and “we notice you working hard”.
Then I think about what my head would sound like if I wasn’t doing my thing. It would suck. It would sound just like all the guilt trips I give myself about other stuff, but on top of all the other stuff. No thanks.
It’s my responsibility to take care of myself- whether it’s staying sober, working hard, walking, writing, or yoga. Even if it’s just brushing and flossing my teeth at night it’s still up to me. Maybe there aren’t fanfares and big prizes but there is the peace of mind I get when all is right in my world.
That’s good enough.